Lifestyle

Journey to Skinny Jeans Land – The Kate Moss Diet

I love Kate Moss. Always. While I was still under the care of my doctor, and making a pitstop in my zebra-filled toilet, I noticed my bamboo basket, which is full of vintage magazines, and I saw Always.

I love Kate Moss.

While I was still under the care of my doctor, and making a pitstop in my zebra-filled toilet, I noticed Kate Moss looking back at me from the bamboo basket.

I heard Miss Moss make a comment while I was at the hospital.

Miss Moss reminded everyone that nothing tastes as good and as satisfying as feeling thin. 

Top Drawer!

Even though she designs for Topshop, which caters to a lot of young girls I can see why everyone is in a frenzy.

These comments are not appropriate for people who have young readers.

Impressionable readers like moi!

It has impressed me so I added another dimension to my diet. It has been named …..

THE KATE MOOSS DIET!

Of course!

It has already helped me lose 3 pounds. It doesn’t matter if it’s water weight or real pounds, I don’t really care. It flew out of my stomach!

It’s worth it

It works!

I visited the local pastry shop. It was Tim Horton’s but the term “pastry shop” sounds wonderful. Anyway, I decided to go to a local pastry shop and order a small baguette. Then I felt compelled to have a donut. All of a sudden, I thought to my self, “This donut won’t taste as good as skinny feelings.” It worked! It made me realize that the jelly-filled monster would go straight through my stomach and stay there. Even though I got a dirty look from the Counter Lady, I didn’t care that I was just one step closer to my skinny jeans!

Possums!

My mother hosted dinner and she made me a new dish: meatloaf. I know. I know. Is meatloaf very common? Ask around. It’s not very common in a Cuban/Jamaican household. My mother asked me why I wasn’t touching her meatloaf. I replied that it didn’t taste as good as thin food. She not only started an argument with me but also with my father who suddenly declared to her that his meatloaf is suspect and probably doesn’t taste as good as thin feels. My brother followed. Then my sister. But not Dante, my sister’s baby.

Dante is Mickey.

He loves everything!

Related Articles

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Back to top button